So, the Race continues. We find our teams departing in the middle of the night only to bunch up and spend the rest of the night together.  In the morning they will be allowed to get their next clue from a nearby ship.

Meanwhile, Marie-the-pink-haired-witch establishes the order in which the teams must board the ship. Surprisingly nobody protests much. I am getting ahead of myself here, but I must tell – based on the video and bio, I sort of liked Marie. She seemed opinionated, fearless, confident.  All the qualities I like in TAR contestants. But what we see so far on the show is shrill, rude, socially clumsy, unpleasant. I hoped for a charming villainess, but got a b*tchy witch instead (or witchy b*tch – whatever your preference).

On the way to Detour (TAR 23, Episode 2)

On the way to Detour (TAR 23, Episode 2)

But I digress. Once aboard, in order to get their next clue, the teams had to figure out the Spanish phrase that a Chilean hero said before sinking his ship. Ability to speak Spanish was not sufficient here – it was one’s resourcefulness that mattered.  Actually I was pleasantly surprised to see that this task made teams spread out a little and arrive at Detour not as one big happy bunched-up crowd but more or less separately. Using bicycles in addition to taking taxis also helped reshuffle the order of arrival.

This Detour was a choice between two tasks – Mining (splitting huge blocks of salt to find the next clue) or Brining (saturating fresh water pools with salt until you are able to float so easily that you can read a newspaper while doing it).

Yes, some teams with the body types that would float the easiest still chose Mining, but everyone deals with their chosen task more or less efficiently. Except the “baseball wives”, that is. Forget about Brining – whining is their thing! They whine, they cry, they proclaim this the “hardest thing” they ever had to deal with. Please! Working three jobs to get the ends meet might be hard. Spending sleepless nights caring for a sick relative might be hard. Coming to a new country with no language, money or friends in search of better life for your child might be hard. You are just playing on a reality show. So – don’t insult people who went through real hardships.

Detour (TAR 23, Episode 2)

Detour (TAR 23, Episode 2)

Having completed the Detour, the teams are taking a 24-hour-long bus ride to Santiago. A great opportunity to rest, chill, sleep and generally regroup. Everybody makes it to one of two buses, everybody but team Bingo. Actually, they have this opportunity, too, but they choose to forego it thinking that they can get on a faster bus. Except they are mistaken, and mistakes tend to put people behind.

Meanwhile on the bus two innocent lambs are selling their souls to the devil. The price? – well, the Express Pass, of course. She-devil with pink hair promises it to the “baseball wives” demanding in return that they do whatever she tells them to do. The lambs happily agree while the devil has nothing but the lamb chops in mind. The ride continues.

Once in Santiago, our teams are faced with shoe-shining Roadblock. We saw shoe-shining tasks on TAR before, but this time around not only shoes of a client have to be polished, but the whole shoe-shining stand has to be correctly packed and delivered to a designated place.

Several teams have difficulties here, especially team Bingo for whom the streak of bad luck just continues. Rowan (he performs this Roadblock for the team)  gets to a random (instead of TAR-designated) shoe-shine stand and practically puts the local shoe-shiner out of work. Eventually he completes the task, and the Bingos almost catch up to the closest team – “baseball wives” (who are surprised that the devil did not keep her part of the bargain…seriously? – you are surprised?!)…

Roadblock (TAR 23, Episode 2)

Roadblock (TAR 23, Episode 2)

Unfortunately “almost” does not count, and the unlucky team Bingo is the second team eliminated from the Race. I hoped against all hope that it would be “baseball wives”, not Bingos, that have to go. “Baseball wives” are humorless, spindly, and whiny, and as interesting as a speck of dust.  Seriously – how can a woman who defines her entire self by her husband’s occupation be interesting?!  Alas, they are still in while the Bingos are out.

What else does the Pit Stop reveal to us? First of all, I am happy for the “Teddy Bears” – Chester and Ephraim – that were the first at the Pit Stop.  I am glad the pink-haired she-devil and her semi-silent side kick arrived at the end of the pack – maybe it will be their serving of humility pie (although – who am I kidding?).

I still have no idea who Jason and Amy are or even if they can talk. I am mildly impressed with the cloned blondes but still can’t decide whether to call them “not bad” or “just lucky”. As for the Afghanimals…Well, their ululating might be annoying, but their fighting is truly scary. They do get at each other like wild animals – I know now where the nickname came from.

Well, let’s see what the future episode brings. Till then!

And here you can find the most up-to-date links on all things The Amazing Race:


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